8 Ways to Improve Your Self-Awareness
Self-awareness is the ability to recognize your emotions, understand your behavioral tendencies, and see how your actions affect others. Read more about what self-awareness is. If you want to become a more self-aware person, there are habits you can start today. Here are eight ways to build self-awareness through observation, feedback, reflection, and practice.
Key Takeaways
- Self-awareness grows through reflection, feedback, and paying attention to how your behavior affects others.
- Learning from positive experiences—not just mistakes—helps you understand your strengths and what helps you succeed.
- Turning self-awareness into specific, achievable goals helps you build better habits and strengthen workplace relationships.
1. Notice your reactions
Pay attention how you respond to everyday situations, especially when you're frustrated or stressed. Do you withdraw when conversations get tense? Take over when a project feels off track?
Self-reflection can help you learn from experience, but repeatedly asking yourself broad questions like “Why am I like this?” may not lead to useful answers. Research on self-reflection distinguishes constructive learning from rumination, in which you replay negative experiences without reaching new insights.
That’s why it’s important to reflect on specific experiences, not just on yourself in general.
2. Look for patterns in your reactions
Observing your emotional reactions can help you understand how your internal experiences influence your behavior. For example, rather than simply labeling an experience as frustrating, explore what about it bothered you.
On the positive side, if you learn what types of situations make you feel energized or confident, you can seek out those environments more.
The goal is to reframe “why” questions as “what” questions: “Why am I feeling checked-out at work?” is less actionable than “What situations make me feel checked-out at work?”
3. Ask for specific feedback from people you trust
Other people can often see patterns in your behavior that you miss. Ask trusted colleagues, managers, or friends how they experience working with you, and be open to hearing something unexpected.
Be specific with your questions so people can offer useful examples rather than general praise or criticism. Look for themes across their responses rather than treating any one opinion as the complete truth.
What's one thing I do that makes it easier to work with me?
Is there anything I do that makes collaboration more difficult?
How do I tend to respond when we're under pressure?
Read more about receiving feedback.
4. Identify your communication preferences
People differ in how directly they communicate, how much detail they prefer, and how quickly they want to make decisions, among other traits. Understanding your own preferences helps you notice when you're assuming everyone works the same way you do.
Consider whether you prefer brief, direct conversations or more context and discussion. Would you rather hash out project details on a video chat or a text chat? Do you process your thoughts aloud or wait until you’ve thought everything through to speak? Consider how preferences like these affect your interactions with colleagues who communicate differently.
If you have taken a DiSC assessment, your report can be very helpful in clarifying your communication style and comparing it with others. Read more about DiSC communication styles.
5. Try a different approach in a familiar situation
Self-awareness isn't just about observing your behavior. It's also about testing what happens when you change it. Trying a different approach helps you recognize habits and assumptions you might not notice when you stick to what's familiar. You may also discover that an approach that works well in one situation isn't as effective in another.
By experimenting with new ways of responding, you can learn more about yourself and become more adaptable when working with different people.
6. Turn an insight into a specific goal
Self-awareness is more useful when it leads to a behavior you can practice. “I need to be a better team player” is vague. “I'll ask a colleague for their input before making a decision that affects their work” gives you a specific action to focus on.
Research on goal setting suggests that identifying a specific action and planning when you'll practice it can help bridge the gap between intention and action.
Practices like if–then planning can keep you focused. An example:
- Insight: I sometimes interrupt people when I'm eager to share an idea.
- Goal: I want to give colleagues more room to express their thoughts.
- Plan: If I feel the urge to jump in during a meeting, then I'll pause and let the other person finish before responding.
7. Reflect on positive experiences
Self-awareness isn't just about examining mistakes or difficult emotions. Reflection is most useful when it helps you learn, not when it keeps you stuck. Repeatedly replaying a mistake or difficult interaction can turn into rumination, which may worsen stress rather than build self-awareness.
Make time to journal or self-reflect on positive experiences, too. Understanding what helps you thrive can help you build on those strengths and repeat the behaviors that lead to positive outcomes.
8. Use a behavioral assessment as a starting point
Self-reflection and feedback can be difficult to structure on your own. A behavioral assessment can give you a framework for exploring your tendencies and discussing how they affect others.
Everything DiSC®, for example, helps people understand their behavioral styles and explore how differences in priorities and preferences influence workplace interactions. Treat your results as a starting point for personal development—not a complete or unchangeable description of who you are.
In summary:
Self-awareness is a trait you can develop. When you commit to learning from experience, accepting feedback, and self-reflection, you’re on the road to a greater understanding of yourself.
When building self-awareness, integrate both internal and external perspectives. How you see yourself and how others experience you are related, but they aren't necessarily the same.
Avoid ruminating on negative experiences. Instead, look for patterns, perspectives, and next steps. Remember to reflect on positives experiences as well.
You don't need to change who you are to become more self-aware. You need to understand yourself well enough to recognize when your usual approach is helping and when another approach might work better.
Sources
- Chon, D., and S. B. Sitkin. Disentangling the Process and Content of Self-Awareness: A Review, Critical Assessment, and Synthesis. Academy of Management Annals (2021).
- Epton, Tracy, Sinead Currie, and Christopher J. Armitage. Unique Effects of Setting Goals on Behavior Change: Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology (2017).
- Gollwitzer, Peter M., and Paschal Sheeran. Implementation Intentions and Goal Achievement: A Meta-Analysis of Effects and Processes. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology (2006).
- Kross, Ethan, Madeline Ong, and Özlem Ayduk. Self-Reflection at Work: Why It Matters and How to Harness Its Potential and Avoid Its Pitfalls. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior (2023).
- London, Manuel, Valerie I. Sessa, and Loren A. Shelley. Developing Self-Awareness: Learning Processes for Self- and Interpersonal Growth. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior (2023).
- Pronin, Emily. How We See Ourselves and How We See Others. Science (2008).
Posted 10/16/2026
